October 19, 2011

Woman, Fetch Me a Sandwich!

This is an excerpt from a biblically based book I'm reading, which shall remain nameless, lest you accuse me of TMI.

"I've heard it said that the wife's role is to submit. Yet submission is not a role. Being a wife is not a role. Submission is an expression of Spirit-filled maturity....

SUBMISSION IS NOT...

  • giving up all efforts to influence your husband, giving in to his every demand.
  • letting him think he's better at something than you are when he isn't.
  • waiting on your husband.
  • obeying. Submit differed from obey, which is given as instruction to children and slaves - and is certainly our duty to God.
  • letting the husband make the final decision.
  • tolerating abuse.
  • going along with your husband even if he wants you to sin, or if he endangers your life.
SUBMISSION IS...

  • being willing and ready to renounce your own wills and ways for that of another.
  • the opposite of striving, rebellion, self-assertions; and of loud, pushy, obnoxious, or boisterous opposition toward another. It involves deference and surrender, inner stillness, and peace.
  • willingly yielding our rights.
  • a voluntary attitude of respect and cooperation.
  • restricted to a woman's actions toward her own husband (as opposed to the belief of some that all women should submit to all men.)
  • an act of God-worship. Submission demonstrates our love for the Lord.
  • entered into with a gentle, quiet spirit. This does not necessarily mean silence, although sometimes silence may be necessary to demonstrate a kind and gracious attitude that radiates peace.
Although evidence may seem to prove your husband is less than ideal, your responsibility as a godly woman in obedience to God requires submission. You may say, "Submit to him? He's a jerk; you don't know him." That may be true.... If he's thoughtful, she can focus more of her energy on helping and supporting him with her strengths; if he's difficult, she must expend more energy working at demonstrating respect when she wants to lash out."

Reading this today, I learned that I am not a submissive wife, but I need to be. My first reaction before reading the last paragraph, was this: "Well if he would realize what submission is NOT, then maybe I could live out what submission IS." Of course, that's not how it's supposed to work. Even if he never learns what submission is NOT, and even if he tries to force me to live in submission to him (according to the first list that he thinks is correct), I am still to submit (according to the second list, which is God's way).

I really suck at this. God has a lot of work to do on me, if I would just shut up and let Him.